My buddy Steve only throws one party per year but it’s a good one. Two big hogs are slaughtered then loaded on an offset smoker while one smaller pig goes on a rotisserie cooker. The six burner range inside the old house is 100% filled up with gumbos, etouffes, red beans, jambalaya and side dishes.

The cooking of that small pig is quite the production. A track hoe is fired up and used to dig a trench in the soil whereupon a few hundred pounds of cured oak and pecan are tossed into the ditch then set ablaze.

The freshly slaughtered pig is skewered with clean steel rods then slowly spun round and round via an electric motor. Nearby, little kids chase piglets slathered in shortening.

A cover band is blasting Ooh Poo Pah Doo in the front yard.

A hot pot man is boiling 100lbs of shrimp one batch at a time.

An oyster shucker is falling behind the crowds demands.

Cracklins are frying in a big cast-iron cauldron.

A guy pulls up flying a Trump flag off the back of his convertible. He’s told he’s welcome to eat but will have to park at a neighbors so the party doesn’t get a bad name.

Somebody shows up with a fat pan of Rocky n Carlos mac and cheese.

Kegs of NOLA Brewing are tapped.

A lady who looks like she’d be right at home on queue outside a Motley Crue tour bus chases her six young children across the yard.

A man walks in with a 40 quart pot of dirty rice. His contribution to the affair.

The band launches into Nathan Abshire.

Just another party in Louisiana.